October 26, 2007 (LPAC)--Russian President Vladimir Putin issued a sharp warning against those threatening sanctions and military action against Iran, which could only be taken to mean Dick Cheney and George W. Bush.

At a press conference in Lisbon, Putin was asked by a reporter about the prospects for settling such divisive issues as Kosovo and Iran.

"With regard to Iran and its nuclear issues," Putin answered, "we categorically oppose any violation of the fundamental provisions of international law on non-proliferation of nuclear and other weapons of mass destruction," reports www.kremlin.ru.

"This was reiterated during my visit to Tehran," he continued. "Moreover, it was set out in the document signed by all of the Caspian nations, including Iran. This was achieved during my visit to Tehran."

"Why exacerbate the situation now, pushing it towards deadlock and threatening sanctions and military action? Only a short time ago it seemed as though it would be impossible to resolve the North Korean nuclear issue, but peaceful means were found nonetheless and we are now well on the road towards settling this problem. I do not think that running around like a madman with a razor, brandishing it in all directions, is the best way to resolve problems of this kind."