July 1, 2008 (LPAC)-- From the heart of the "Bible Belt" in Zanesville, Ohio, this morning, Presidential hopeful Barack Obama announced a new "fake-biased" initiative, something which he is calling the Council for Faith-Based and Neighborhood Partnerships. As he continued his "drift to the right," Obama told a crowd at a local homeless shelter, that today's problems are "simply too big for government alone to solve," as he worked to dispel lingering questions about his own faith. Not to be "out-faithed" by Bush, however, Obama said he would elevate the program to a "moral center" of his administration. He would also change the training from occasional huge conferences to empowering larger religious charities to mentor smaller ones in their communities, creating, if you would, a "hierarchy of faith." He also proposes a $500 million-per-year program to provide summer learning for 1 million poor children to help close achievement gaps with "wealthier" students.

Some members of the "amen chorus" were saying that Obama had finally "seen the light." Others were arguing that it was rather various shades of "green" at work.