August 18, 2007 (LPAC)--Markets around the world were closed on Sunday, but there was a substantial rally in the closely-watched BSI (Bull-Shit Index), on which the sun never sets, not even on weekends. The BSI almost always gives market insiders a preview of what will happen in the trend-setting futures markets, which of course determine what will happen on the markets on Monday morning. So it is safe to predict that everything is going to be just fine for the coming week--or so the weekend's major news media would have you believe.

Today's leading performers on the BSI were:

• The London Sunday Times: "Underlying dangers are probably not as bad as many people fear; the problem is not knowing what they are... Central banks will have to cut interest rates aggressively to contain the market crisis, leading economists say."
• The London Sunday Telegraph quotes a senior partner at accounting firm Grant Thornton as advising, "The worst thing people could do is panic and sell shares at the wrong time." The Telegraph adds nervously that "Today, however, the root of the problem is much harder to pin down. What started as an isolated problem in a small part of the U.S. financial system - the sub-prime market - has evolved into a full-blown global crisis."
• A second article in the Telegraph says that "Bankers report a 'big chill' spreading through the City as advisers postpone takeover deals and flotations," and then quotes Confederation of British Industry director-general Richard Lambert with the following profound insight: "We just don't know what's lurking out there. We are in for a period of uncertainty as the scale of investment losses becomes clear."
• The New York Times: "Credit Time Bomb Ticked, but Few Heard; How Missed Signs Contributed to a Mortgage Meltdown," is the headline on a front page article which tells the inspiring tale of Jim Melcher of Balestra Capital hedge fund, who was smart enough to use complex derivatives to bet that sub-primes would eventually crash, and has since seen his fund double in value. "Mr. Melcher is heading to Paris for a vacation with his wife," the Times confides. But otherwise, the Times says, almost nobody knew there was a crisis coming. Lyndon LaRouche responded by asking: "When is the New York Times finally going to learn to read EIR, before once again embarrassing itself in public?"
• Parade, the Sunday magazine appearing in the Washington Post and dozens of other newspapers across the country, juxtaposes the following two headlines on its cover: "How to avoid foreclosure," and "You can get a flatter stomach." LPAC researchers are still working on determining what, if any, causal relationship exists between the two.

The item on foreclosures turns out to be a very helpful list of "tips" for the 7 million Americans who may be left homeless in the immediate future: "1) Contact your lender; 2) Respond to all mail from your lender; 3) Know your rights; 4) Prioritize your spending; 5) Avoid foreclosure-prevention companies and scams; 6) Get help from HUD." The HUD, we are assured, "offers free or low-cost counselors"--sort of like the sub-prime mortage you now can't pay.